After 13 years in education, I’m failing.
I’m failing as a teacher, I’m failing as a motivator, and I’m failing as a confidant.
There are a handful of kids in my class this year that are really putting me through the ringer. They are mentally wiping me out. And because of this, I’m failing.
I’ve mentioned “Tommy” before. “Tommy” is failing…literally. He has difficulty reading, writing, with math, speaking in sentences, and his behavior is out of control. He hits, whines, and just makes teaching a simple lesson the hardest thing in the world to do. I have talked with the parents, he has a tutor, he is on medication, I’ve recommended neurological testing, the administration is informed. It’s to the point where I just want to give up. I’m tired and it’s only November.
Then there is “Jim.” “Jim” is honestly one of the cutest kids I have ever seen. He struggles academically, but I am in close contact with his parents and his tutor, and with a bit of TLC, he will reach grade level expectations. But recently, he acts like the class clown. He dismisses all that I try to say, any form of punishment that I have given. I have even tried positive reinforcement by rewarding him for one simple day of great behavior…nothing.
“Brad” is another one. He has a hearing issue. This hampers his ability to speak in complete sentences. He has a wonderful memory, but applying his understanding is difficult. This one I can work with. He at least tries.
But still, I am failing. I am failing these 3 gems that have been placed at the top of my barrel because I just can’t seem to reach them. I am failing the rest of the class who could also use some individual time.
I am failing the whole class because I am not happy in the classroom at all. I feel like all I do is reprimand kids all day. My poor little quiet rule followers are being pushed aside because 99% of my time is on the ones who are struggling and are behavior problems.
I really just want to give up.
Alexis